Life Update: Chaos and the Coming Days

Hey Bookworms! I needed to write something and I didn’t know what to write in this fog of sadness and pain. This isn’t just going to be about books, but about my LDR, the weather, a few points about my cerebral palsy, COVID-19, but yes I will talk about books. Let’s get started!

Chaos and the Coming Days

LDR

So first off let me start off by saying today is hard. It was supposed to be my first day with my boyfriend. I work hospitality, so when at work I receive all the updates about what we’re canceling, borders that are closing, and travel bans. When we got the notification that cancellations were happening at least until the 14th of April (it is my weekend, so I haven’t seen any newer updates since Sunday).

I knew on Saturday, I would have to change my ticket. It hurt like hell to do because at this point I haven’t seen him in 4 months.  I was supposed to leave in 2 days at that point to spend, 6 nights, and 5 days together. The most time we have spent together in a while. Not to mention this is the first time in 2 years, we have spent a birthday a part, this is what hurts the worst.

While I have a new flight booked for May with a new flexible change policy, just in case. (I am so grateful for Westjet being so helpful and understanding). I am praying this all calms down by then. My family and friends are all saying at least you are both healthy and safe, but it doesn’t mean it didn’t crack our hearts open.

I am trying to remain patient and hopeful as this is what all LDR’s are built off of. I am sending my positive thoughts out to others separated by these closures. I am trying to find comfort and not jealousy of the couples that are currently together even when it’s hard, as this is what we have to look forward to.

The Weather, Cerebral Palsy, and COVID-19

This is probably one of the few times you’ll hear me talking about my CP because although it a part of me, I try to not let it define me. I also don’t want people to assume my experience with CP is the same as another person with  CP.  Like most disabilities and disorders it is on a spectrum and has different types (which is what I hope anybody who writes about this disability includes this notes because it can set false expectations and be harmful to those who are uneducated).

While COVID-19 is affecting a lot of people with different immune deficiencies, disabilities, disorders, the young, and people over 50.  Some people with Cerebral Palsy do have weakened immune systems, thankfully, I have not been one of those people. I have only been sick at least once a year in my life if that (not including allergies), and some of those were self inflicted by being a stubborn child by and not eating when I was supposed to, often times for a full day, or weather changing rapidly.

With this extended winter we’ve been facing (the groundhog lied…), my body has been paying the price. I have been aching and swelling for weeks as the weather is on the roller coaster it is and possibly having another disability that may tie into this pain (which I can’t get checked until Fall again). I am more afraid of how my body pain is affecting me more this year than it has before than I am of a virus, because I know my body can fight it. I know I am practicing the right things, and I am trying to remain calm, because stress and anxiety can weaken the immune system.

Work

I don’t tend to talk much about work on here. Thankfully I still have work, and I am trying to stay calm and positive again. Putting money in savings and trying to be diligent. I am sending all good thoughts for those of you who can’t go to work and I am hoping my work stays consistent.

Days I am Home

On my days I have off which is a 3 day weekend this weekend because I didn’t feel it was fair to go into work on my birthday this year due to everything that went on last week. I am spending my 28th on March 18th at home, with my family, cake, books, and a movie binge. I know a lot of us are worried with the actual libraries shut down, but there is still Overdrive and Libby if you have WiFi or data access to download when you don’t have access to either.

We have each other, this blogging community, our words to reach each other even when these borders are shut down.

Want to work out, look up exercises to do at home, when I am not in pain I try to move as much as possible.

Board games, so you can keep your mind going, video games, movies and books that will make you think.

Sing, get lost in music, dance, write a poem, if your mind starts to wander in the wrong way redirect it or at least distract it.

Create don’t let your mind focus on the panic as that’s when we become our worst selves. Most importantly be kind, try not to panic buy, to help others who need the resources. This is something I stick buy as I can’t always get out due to my current state.

We are all stronger that the remenants that 2019 is holding over us. I refuse to blame 2020 for this as this started last year hence the name. 2020 is trying to teach us to be strong, calm, patient, and kind. Don’t let 2019’s left overs turn is into scared sheep.

I am going to try and practice all these suggestions, and I hope you all do too. I hope this rant stayed somewhat coherent. Happy Reading Bookworms, stay calm healthy, and safe!

 

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Book Talk: Reading Books We Hate

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What kept My Mind Off the Cold: January, February, & March Rap Wrap-Up

Hey bookworms! I know I haven’t posted in a bit, but it’s been a bit busy lately. I  know I wanted to try and do month, but winter was busy for me with my Birthday trip and all the overtime it took to save. But, anywho, you’re here for the books not to hear me whine, so let’s get started!

 

January Reads

 1. The Rose Society by Marie Lu

The Rose Society

So for those of you who have seen my signature, will know I had to pick up this sequel due to the cover. I mean can you blame me. I wish I could say I felt the same for the story that I did the cover. Although I love the idea of this series because it sings to my X-Men loving heart. It is like a retelling of it in a way at least to my mind. Adelina reminds me of a friend that really hurt me last year, and I can’t help but want this character to be redeemed. Magiano was the one that kept me reading. I gave the book a 2.8 out of 5 stars.

 

2.  Dumplin’ By Julie Murphy

Dumpling

I gave this book a 3 out of 5 stars. I related to the mother-daughter relationship. In the way the mother assumes she is helpin g the daughter with her opinions that maybe ended a bit blunt and sometimes hurtful without meaning to. The female friendships made me so happy because I feel so many stories are lacking friendships lately. Friendships are starting to become minor points in stories and I don’t want to think they are becoming minor points life as well.

3. Nothing by Annie Barrow

Nothing

I gave this a 2.8 stars although it was a cute coming of age of age it really irked me the names these girls called each other. It wasn’t okay.

4. Between the Lines by Jodi Picoult and Samantha Van Leer

Between the Lines.jpg

I gave this one 3.3 stars. I loved the idea of the characters having personalities outside of the ones that were written for them in their story. The romance felt a bit lacking for me, but the story stuff rang true to me. Especially the part where the author said she heard the character’s voices in her head. As a writer myself that is my favorite sound and I miss that the most.

6. Saint Anything by Sarah Dessen

Saint Anything

4 stars! This book reminded me of everything about Dessen’s writing that made me feel less alone when I was younger. It reminded me that I wasn’t alone with the problems I faced. That other people faced them too. This book was like comfort food in her writing style if that makes sense.

6.  Before the Devil Breaks You by Libba Bray

Before the Devil Breaks You

This book got 4 stars from me only because of that cliff hanger! I was ready for this series to be over, but I do how much that I greatly care for these characters so I’m not too angry about getting to see more of their stories.

7. Birthmarked by  Caragh M. O’Brien

Birthmarked

I gave this book  3 out of 5 stars. For a dystopian book I still don’t know what to think of it but it had some really good action parts that kept my attention.

February

1. Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell

Fangirl

3 stars I like the writing process and Cath’s professor’s advice, but I feel this would’ve made more of an impact on me if I read this 4-5 years ago. It did make me miss writing fanfiction and just writing in general. Maybe one day I will feel the pull again.

2. Cleopatra’s Moon by  Vicky Alvear Shecter

Cleopatra's Moon

I gave this book 3 out of 5 stars there was a bit of lag in some parts, but this book reminded me why historical fiction and royalty pulled me in when I was younger. I am hoping this means it has reignited my craving.

3. Made You Up by Francesca Zappia

Made You Up

This book was a 4 out of 5 stars for me it was really good to hear about mental health especially a disorder you don’t hear much about. This story really put you in the main character’s head and shoes. It made you experience her feelings and struggles in such a vivid way.

4. Down Among the Sticks and Bones by Seanan McGuire

Down Among the Sticks and Bones

This shows how horrible of a bookworm I am. I loved the first book and didn’t even know that the next two books were out. I loved learning about the twins and the LGBTQ elements in these books and the backstory and magical realism mixed with the fantasy is my favorite thing ever. It was an amazingly good short devour and I gave this a 4 out of 5 stars and now I need to own these books!

5. Beneath the Sugar Sky by Seanan McGuire

Beneath the Sugar Sky

After finishing the last book and knowing the third was already out. I had to buy the third audio book for myself and it did not disappoint. The world building is AMAZING! 5 out of 5 stars!

6. Marked by PC and Kristin Cast

Marked

4 out of 5 stars because sometimes a reread is all the comfort and happiness you need in the world.

7. One Dark Throne by Kendare Blake

One Dark Throne

I gave it a 4 out of 5 stars. It would have been 5 out of 5 but there were some parts that lost my attention due to lag, but it has all the things to keep me picking up a book. I can’t wait to see what happens at the end.

8. Uglies by Scott Westerfield

Uglies

I have this a 3 out of 5 stars. I think I would’ve enjoyed this more in my teens when I was into dystopian but I only read it on a rare occasions now. It was an interesting twist on conformity though.

9. Finding Audrey by Sophie Kinsella

Finding Audrey

I know I’ve been reading a lot of contemporary, but it’s not my favorite genre truly. I will admit it is easy to read though. For not loving Contemporary I found I love Sophie Kinsella. Her humor and her books always make me laugh. 3 out of 5 stars.

10. City of the Lost by Kelley Armstrong

City of the Lost

I started this book last December but didn’t get to finish it before my turn was up at the library. Let me tell you these plot twists definitely made it worth the wait! 5 out of 5 stars!

March

My favorite month of the whole year! My birthday month! These are the books that helped me get to and celebrate 26!

1. Out of the Easy by Ruta Sepetys 

Out of the Easy

When I say I don’t like contemporary that of course excludes Historical Fiction. I know I am so odd, but historical fiction has always been one of my deepest loves for as long as I can remember. This book was such a great reminder of that. I gave this a 4 out of 5 stars.

2. Unbecoming by Jenny Downham

Unbecoming

This was one of my random picks for the month and I pretty much went in blind because to be honest I think I skimmed the summary. This is a great example of the when going in blind works out great. The story telling and the three perspectives were great for world building and was enough to have flash backs. It was perfect to fill all my fictional cravings when I picked it up. 4 out of 5 stars.

3. NTR – Netsuzou Trap Vol. 1 by Naoko Kodama, Catherine Ross (Translator), Shannon Fay (Adaptation), CK Russell (Lettering)

NTR - Netsuzou Trap Vol 1

This yuri was a little disappointing because it felt Hotaru was too forceful on Yuma. If she was just honest I feel this was honest, maybe even a bit more seductive this would’ve been so much better. I gave this one a 2 out of 5 stars. I might try and see if it’s available at the library instead of picking up and buying the next copy.

4. Citrus Vol 7 by Saburo Uta

Citrus

Although Mei’s and Yuzu’s love did have a forcefulness in the beginning you could tell the underlying feelings were there. I fell behind on this series, but then I remembered it was becoming an anime! So I needed to devour what was out to hype myself up and I was disappointed by neither the adaption or this volume. I gave this one a 4 out of 5 stars.

5. Midnight Jewel by Richelle Mead

Midnight Jewel

Although there was some parts of this book I didn’t like like pretty much retelling the first book… The romance in this one though was hot, and I like the couples with conflict. That argue that does not fall easy are my favorites. They are the more realistic to me and draw me in too easily. 4 out of 5 stars for just the romance alone! Don’t judge me she writes good friction and tension!

6. Bloom into You, Vol. 1 by Nakatani Nio

Bloom into You 1

I loved the idea of this manga that love can grow. It doesn’t have to be hot it can be slow and patient. It was so sweet I gave it a 4 out of 5 stars.

7. Memoirs of a Teenage Amnesiac by Gabrielle Zevin

Memoirs of a Teenage Amnesiac

This was a 2.8 stars for me because how fickle Naomi became kinda irked me and ruined the good parts for me.

8. Far from the Tree by Robin Benway

Far from the Tree.jpg

The tagline got me guys! “For fans of This is Us” which is my mom and my favorite show and it was not a disappointment. The bond between the siblings was so sweet and true. It also hit on adoption which I feel isn’t a topic covered by many books. 4 out of 5 stars.

Well guys that what I read this winter! I am so sorry this took forever to post! I am trying to get better I promise. Have you read any of these? Feel free to let me know in the comments below because I really do miss you all. Have a wonderful week and most importantly Happy Reading!

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